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he’s my best friend
People let me tell you ‘bout my best friend,
He’s a warm hearted person who’ll love me till the end.
People let me tell you bout my best friend
People let me tell you ‘bout him he’s so much fun . . . Yes, he’s my best friend. My best friend
(“Best Friend” by Harry Nilsson; theme song to the tv show “The Courtship of Eddie’s Father;” sorry, it’s not embedded. I even signed up for Youtube, but still no luck getting the video to “appear” in the blog. And apologies if I give you the same earworm I now have!)
ChronicBabe.com’s blog carnival current question: “who’s your best friend? . . . share how important these friendships are in being incredible ChronicBabes!”
Well, let me tell ya ‘bout my b(m)f: been friends for almost 36 years; met at a new year’s eve party. (Picture tacky furniture and ‘70s hair!). All because he eats peanut butter and mincemeat* sandwiches heated in the microwave. A factiod his partner told me when I refused the bowl of peanuts. My most evil allergy and least favourite food nuked! A happenchance convergence; coincidence or synchronicity? From the first odd exchange when introduced “Do you really eat . . .” (and I had no odd food combo to contribute), I sensed best friend material. A strange and wonderful feeling; I tend not to make friends easily, lightly, or lastingly.** Yet, like some wild bumper car carnival ride, no matter how far and fast we go in different directions, we still keep careening back into each other’s lives.
We drift apart; we come back together. We keep in touch; we have long silences. Our life paths are so different (when we met and now) yet we can still relate to each other. Conversations where we never said a word out loud; shared darkest secrets, lowest points, highest joys. Not always honest (I’ve self-censured as I’m sure he has), but always sincere. I’ll send a crazy card or email; he’ll make a phone call. We have relied on each other in the past; I’m relying on him again.
Now we have something more in common: chronic pain and chronic illness. He has a rare form of arthritis that eats at his knees and knuckles. We limp, we shuffle, we groan. We try different diets, rounds of meds and alternative therapies. Tentative at first after years of my pushing away, this chronicness deepened our friendship in strange and unexpected ways.
The closeness that meant we could communicate with just thoughts is gone; lost in the exuberance of youth. Still there is warmth like candle-glow, connectedness, a shy and sly smile at antics past. When we may not be able to forgive ourselves, we have always forgiven each other. From first excruciating pun 36 years ago to last night’s phone call, he’s been my best friend, “a warm-hearted person who’ll love me to the end.”
On our 35th anniversary, we danced to ‘70s music; I think we’re both glad we lost the ‘70s hair! ***
Just Phylor
*Mincemeat is a mixture of chopped dried fruit, distilled spirits and spices, and sometimes beef suet, beef, or venison. Originally, mincemeat always contained meat.[1] Many modern recipes contain beef suet, though vegetable shortening is sometimes used in its place. Variants of mincemeat are found in Australia, Brittany, Canada, northern Europe, Ireland, the UK and the United States. In some countries the term mincemeat refers to minced or ground meat. (via wikipedia; I’m providing the definition b/c when I mentioned mince meat in a comment, folks wondered what it was.)
** . . . in the real world; I’ve found some special friends in the cyberverse.
*** If only I had a scanner here! I could include some mid-‘70s pix that would embarrass us both even more!
Related articles
- Blog Carnival #31 – Summer Plans (chronicbabe.com)
- Best Friends – Chronic Babe Style (hibernationnow.wordpress.com)
is a moving testimony, the truth is that there are very few good friends as you get older, you lucky!
Thank you for dropping by. Keeping friends over the years can be difficult as each of you grow/go in different directions. The special ones/relationship is when you can finish a conversation started many years before. The ability to slip back into each other’s lives as friends after years of distance feels very good and special!
It’s a best tribute to your friend; I am wordless after reading your blog… it’s really amazing. It was really a great moment when you were dancing with your friend on your 35th anniversary on 70s music; your song is also good.
Thanks — as it turned out, as usual, I was a year off (I’m usually running a year ahead or a year behind!0 I should mention we watched and danced to the (what is incredibly catchy and horrible at the same time) video “funky town,” which now haunts me as musac in stores and elevators!
Still planning on some more 1970s hair style scans — can’t believe we were EVER that YOUNG!
Will check out your blog about best friends; a great topic to be sure!
” … Still there is warmth like candle-glow, connectedness, a shy and sly smile at antics past. When we may not be able to forgive ourselves, we have always forgiven each other …”
Oh, I can so relate. It is wonderful to still have a BF after all these years. Priceless!!
Thanks Becca! It’s odd how some friends just seem to stick; time can pass, but the distance of geography and time seems so easy to cross when you meet up with them again. And, now that we’re both chronics, we can comiserate on a whole new level, lol
Hi Max:
Glad you stopped by and left a comment.
Still working on that vacation thing (don’t tell your human til we need to send her to Canada). How to approach those rich relatives for a spot in their backyard spa and a pocketful of fancy dog treats.
I won’t tell her about the being right stuff.
When I visit, you’ll have to put the peanutbutter away; I very allergic. The rich folks funded dog treats might make up for this.
Dear MY best Friend Lorraine,
I think your best friend may be my best friend too – mincemeat sounds really good. I already like peanut butter.
I like your post too. My Human told me you were a really good writer. She is right (she’s always right, but don’t tell her I told you)
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, Max
What a nice tribute to your best friend. I can’t get my act together enough to put something together..think I missed the deadline already!
I have a Category in my list of categories for WordPress.com called something like “Missed Blog Carnivals” because I inevitably forget the deadline or forget to find out theme, or forget to submit.
I need a new colo(u)r of post-it-notes for blog carnivals and their due dates! LOL
If I remember a date and place, I can try and remember to remind you.
Aren’t they great. I recently saw someone that I had known since, I think, ’81. We lost touch for about 12 years after I moved out of the province. I got in contact (I actually created a Facebook account to get in touch with her) and you never would have known we hadn’t seen each other over the years. And serendipity is a wonderful thing because she had to come to town for business one weekend and we hung out for a few hours…just like old times.
Hope things are going better for you now and you’ll have a chance to slow down and enjoy some of the summer.
Maureen
What a wonderful serendipitious (spelling) ocassion. Reconnecting after years creates warm feelings. Glad you had the chance to hang out together! Face book is amazing for the way you can find folks, creating new or reviving old friendships.
What a keeper!!! Congrats on your 35th (although I’m not sure I know when that was…..)
ps: I volunteer to deliver my scanner to your current abode if you promise the missing selection of 70′s pix.;)
Have a printer with scanner capabilities elsewhere so I promise I will do a 70s photo shoot! I’m not sure I have the best one: both of us dressed up to go to my university prom (my first and only prom). We ended up ditching the grad party and going downtown dancing — much more fun!
Now, I’m not sure if that was our 35th anniversay (pix was new year’s eve 2008 or 09 — foggy today); we met sometime around 1974 or 1975. Seeing him this afternoon. He now understands the “foggy-groggies” having seen me come out of the grocery store and walk in the opposite direction of where he was waiting for me! Hopefully, he’ll be able to pin down the two dates!
The last two years or so have sort of collapsed into a montage/collage of snapshot memories.
Heard a great comedy routine about losing nouns; sure sounded like me!